Macho Culture or Sensitivity? How to Develop Male Emotionality

Effects of macho culture in the 20th century

Western societies have for centuries shaped their idea of masculinity based on emotional restraint. In the 19th and early 20th centuries, the prevailing belief was that the typical and normative behavior of men was associated with not showing affection. Men were seen as breadwinners and protectors of the family, and lack of sensitivity and high self-control were said to favor both of these roles. Excessive expression of feelings, on the other hand, was considered inappropriate.

The modern understanding of masculinity is still based on the assumption that it is innate and assigned to biological sex. Meanwhile, “masculinity” is more of a social construct than a biological one. Expecting from each man a specific set of qualities that fit a culturally created pattern can be hurtful and result in negative consequences in the area of quality of life and mental health.

The emergence in the middle of the 20th century of “macho culture” reinforced restrictive emotional norms for men. Cultural phenomena, emphasized for example in westerns, and the promotion of the “tough guy” personality, cultivated physical fitness and the suppression of emotions. Emotional sensitivity was identified with weakness, which made the suppression of emotions a desirable trait and a way to deal with feelings such as sadness or regret. Expectations of this type resulted in higher rates of emotional isolation among men, which researchers associate with mental health problems that can lead to depression, for example.

Psychological consequences of emotion suppression

While stereotypical perceptions of masculinity are still prevalent, numerous studies show that replicating a pattern of masculinity based on the saying “Guys don't cry” is a psychological burden for men and has real consequences for their well-being. Suppression of emotions has been linked to alexithymia — a difficulty in understanding and expressing feelings — which affects men more often than women. It has also been shown that men who adhere to traditional norms of masculinity are more likely to engage in harmful coping mechanisms in crisis situations, such as aggression, instead of openly confronting their emotions. The desire to maintain the image of a “tough guy” leads to numerous problems, such as:

1. Increased risk of depression and anxiety disorders

The suppression of natural emotions such as sadness, fear or vulnerability can lead to the accumulation of unresolved feelings, which negatively affects mental health. Research indicates that men who rigidly adhere to traditional norms of masculinity are more likely to experience symptoms of depression and anxiety, but are less likely to recognize them. Suppression of emotions often manifests itself in irritability, aggression or withdrawal.

2. Higher suicide rate

Worldwide, men are much more likely to commit suicide than women. For example, in the United States, 79% of suicides are committed by men. The key cause of this disparity is the inability to express emotions and the apprehension associated with seeking mental care. Research shows that men who live within traditional masculine norms are less likely to reveal suicidal thoughts or seek professional help, which further exacerbates the problem.

3. Worse physical health

Chronic suppression of emotions negatively affects physical health, intensifying physiological responses to stress. Prolonged stress contributes to problems such as cardiovascular disease or reduced immunity. Men who avoid coping with emotional distress are also more likely to engage in risky behaviors such as smoking, excessive alcohol consumption, which further harms their physical health.

How can men develop emotional intelligence?

Research shows that men are much less likely than women to seek mental health help. It does not help in building strategies for dealing with emotions and developing emotional intelligence — the ability to understand and use emotional information in cognitive processes (e.g. in thinking, information processing, decision making, etc.). Still, there are ways that can help men develop this skill. These are:

1. Redefining the norms of masculinity through education and awareness

One of the first steps in caring for men's well-being is to redefine rigid norms of masculinity. Educational programs and campaigns can make society reflect on thinking about masculinity. For example, workshops or so-called male circles, which challenge traditional stereotypes of masculinity and encourage men to discuss their feelings in a safe, non-judgmental environment, have been shown to increase openness and self-awareness. Such initiatives help to understand that emotional intelligence is a useful competence, not a weakness, and emotions are part of human nature.

2. Emotional Competence Exercise

Developing emotional skills, such as understanding and naming your feelings, is a key component of emotional intelligence. These competencies can be practiced and developed by writing down your emotions in a journal and determining their intensity using numbers. In such training, answers to questions will help:

• What emotion am I feeling now?
• How sad am I on a scale of 1 to 10?
• What exactly made me sad?
• What thoughts accompany this emotion?
• What do I feel in my body now?

This process helps to identify emotions and reduce the fear of feeling them. Research shows that improving emotional skills has a beneficial effect on relationships with others and reduces the tendency to suppress emotions.

3. Cultivating Self-Compassion Skills

Self-compassion is the ability to treat yourself with kindness and understanding, especially in moments of failure or emotional distress. It can lead to the development of sensitivity and improvement of psychological well-being, reducing the tendency to excessive self-criticism.

Despite the growing awareness of the harmfulness of the traditional perception of masculinity, the old schemes are still present. Men in cultural, social or business contexts continue to face stigmatization when they show vulnerability. The solution to this problem requires systemic changes in the way of upbringing or education.

However, younger generations seem to be increasingly accepting of greater emotional expression. It is worth working to promote the idea of a new definition of masculinity that embraces both strength and emotional authenticity. This approach will take away from men the pressure that negatively affects their mental health and quality of life.

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