How to improve resilience, or mental toughness?

It’s a different story when it comes to the mind. Here, even the word resilience, which also means resistance—only in a psychological sense—sounds quite foreign. Not to mention that we aren't taught how to take care of this area. Yet, it is an extremely important issue, and not just seasonally, but all year round. It is about how our body reacts to stress and whether it is able to neutralize its negative impact quickly enough, not only on our mood but also on our physical health.

Resilience – an acquired or innate trait?

Just like "traditionally" understood immunity, resilience is also naturally higher in some of us. Such people cope better with traumatic experiences, are more flexible when facing life's challenges, and do not experience such strong somatic symptoms of stress. This is largely influenced by individual character, but also by upbringing and the support of those around us. And that is actually good news – because it means that there are external factors, dependent on us, that support resilience. As a result, we can build it, just like immunity to seasonal colds.

How can you increase your mental resilience?

People with strong resilience are often those who draw on the strength provided by a supportive environment – family, friends, and acquaintances. It is worth creating such a support system and using it when we feel down. Interestingly, helping others also builds our own mental strength, which is why nurturing relationships is so important.

It will probably come as no surprise that mental resilience and self-confidence go hand in hand. People who trust their own decisions and do not succumb to excessive self-criticism cope much better in stressful situations. As you can see, there are many more benefits to cultivating this trait.

Optimism is also a good shield against the effects of stress. Of course, this is not about falling into the trap of toxic positivity and facing constant disappointment. It is more about an attitude that allows us to approach potential problems creatively, focusing on action rather than assuming failure from the start. This sense of agency is, of course, linked to self-confidence, but it also requires a belief in success. Helplessness—the conviction that "it won't work out anyway"—allows stress to take control of us and makes trauma harder to process.

Can optimism be learned?

Absolutely. For starters, by asking yourself the right questions to challenge negative beliefs. It sounds complicated, but it is actually quite simple. Let’s say friends cancel a visit you were looking forward to. The negative belief is: surely we aren't as important to them as they are to us, maybe not at all. Some of us might even catastrophize, assuming the entire friendship is slowly but surely cooling off or heading toward an end. Training an optimistic approach involves challenging these assumptions. Ask yourself what other reasons could explain the cancellation—after all, friends have the right to get sick or have an urgent matter to attend to. Then, analyze the situation rationally: can one evening really disrupt a long-standing friendship? Finally, decide on an action that gives you back control, such as proposing a new date for the meeting tomorrow. This behavioral framework is proposed by American psychologist Prof. Martin Seligman, who describes his methods as positive psychology.

Some psychologists also point to practicing gratitude as a way to build a positive outlook on the world. Regardless of how your day went, make a list of things that went well before you fall asleep. Appreciate your own achievements, as well as favors from loved ones and anything else that makes you feel good. This will help you develop a mindset that is helpful during more difficult times.

What else can we practice to build resilience?

It turns out… the body. Taking care of a proper diet, physical activity, and quality sleep will benefit not only your health but also your stress resistance.

However, there are times when, despite your best efforts, building resilience is difficult or even impossible. There can be many reasons for this, most notably deep-seated, unresolved trauma or a lack of a sense of security from an early age. In such cases, seeking help from a therapist is the ideal solution.

Why is this so important? Because resilience is our shield against the difficulties that life will inevitably throw our way. It largely determines whether we emerge from them stronger or more damaged. Remember, prevention is always better than cure.

How to build mental resilience?

• Nurture friendships and surround yourself with supportive people.
• Strengthen your self-confidence.
• Don't assume failure—adopt an optimistic approach to life.
• Practice gratitude.
• Maintain a healthy diet and stay active.
• If you're struggling to cope on your own, reach out to a professional for help.